Namaste_Heather

Disclaimer . . . I decided today, for the second day of 21.5.800, that I would just write. It is not intended to offend. These are simply my random thoughts on life. My writing process is typically to flow . . . to let the words come out and then re-read and edit into a coherent piece. This post is unedited.

At what point do we lose childhood wonder? At what point do we become aloof and un-trusting of others? When do some of us become self-centered and inwardly focused, instead of opening our hearts and looking for the good in others?

My daughter, M, on the brink of adolescence surprises and teaches me lessons in lovingkindness all the time. On shopping trips, she’ll regularly stop someone and say, “I like your outfit.” “You’re hair is pretty.” or “I like your dog.” Most of the statements are simple, but they are kind and focused on someone else instead of her. She gives a little piece of herself to each of these people and many of them are taken back by her comments. Sometimes they’ll pause, look around, and then say “thank you”. Others will just look at her, not quite knowing what to do.

Isn’t it true that more often than not we are afraid of being personally attacked by the general public? If you’ve ever worked in retail or food service, you probably understand this first hand. I worked in both fields for a number of years. People who do not know you will take their whole day out on you, just to feel better. But, how are they making themselves feel better by attacking you? I’ve never understood that concept.

I think we are all guilty of living in our egos from time to time, some of us more so than others. I remember Wayne Dyer’s definition of the EGO as “Edging God Out”. While this may not be an accurate scientific definition of ego, it makes sense to me. When we edge God out, we edge ourselves out, so to speak. The ego is the I, that personality we identify with as our true self. However, our True selves are so much bigger than this ego-centered I we identify with .

Isn’t our True self connected to the Universe and all that is? So, how can we bring our selves back to center, but to the True self that existed fully before the ego formed? Certainly, I don’t have the answers. I’m on the path, just like everyone else here on Earth. But, I do think its worth some attention and discussion.

How do we find ways to be kind to others, especially when we don’t care for them? I have neighbors who are extremely loud, curse at their children and others on the street, and are a general nuisance to the neighborhood. I don’t agree with their actions, but they only live what they know. It’s sad, but I must practice lovingkindness toward them, otherwise I’m as much of the problem as they are. Recently their kids came over and were talking to me. They’re good kids. They pay me compliments, wave and say “hello” but they have already developed the patterns of their parents – being loud, screaming at each other. Two of the boys are older than M and I hear them crying, like they are wee-children. Learned behavior? A tactic to get attention? It is very sad to me.

I am thankful to have grown up in a middle class home with parents who taught me right from wrong, in a moral sense. But, does that make me better than a poor person who steals because it is all they know? I don’t think so. In these crazy times in which we live, more acceptance is necessary for our survival.

Humanity is spiraling down, down, down . . . toward destruction. Sorry to be so heavy. But I think it’s true. When I see the way people talk to one another, teachers talk down to our kids, the horrific ways in which superior humans treat animals, the unconsciousness of people with their garbage and consumption, it scares me.

I heard a saying once about a butterfly’s wings flapping in Japan could cause an earthquake somewhere else in the world. It stuck with me. Every living being is deeply connected to all that is. It’s that simple. In our Western society we’ve advanced so much in Science and Medicine, which is great, but what about the basics? We’ve forgotten them.

People bitch about politics but are unwilling to do anything about making change. Entitlement as Americans has left many of us feeling like someone else should fix it for us. What are the answers? Despite yoga and meditation, I have so much swimming around in my head regarding these matters everday. Sometimes its overwhelming. Sometimes I feel helpless.

We all make a difference. We all matter. It’s so hard to feel as though you are making a difference in the world when all you see is destruction and despair, when all you’re even able to do everyday is work to provide food and shelter for your family. It’s easy to become overwhelmed, throw up your hands and say, “I give up”, then go have a drink to check out of the world. I can say I’ve been guilty of just that.

So, how do we begin? How do we find sanity? How do we feel okay with all that is? For me, it’s about finding center. To find center, its about doing what I love . . . practicing and teaching yoga, writing, being in nature, spending time with my family, being kind to others (even if they’re not so kind to me), and anything else that sparks my soul on any given day.

Life is. People are. We cannot change anyone but ourselves. That’s pretty exhilarating though, isn’t it? Every time I go down the destruction road, I bring it back. Life is beautiful. Yes, there are terrible things happening, but there are also wonderful moments each day if we only look for them. I am awed and humbled by life. How can anyone every be bored knowing this?

Deep breath . . . Publish.