Inhale . . . LET
Exhale . . . GO!
Image: credit
Happy Sunday! Here’s a lovely quote borrowed from Twitter friend @moonbeamwishes, who has a blog by the same name. Check her out! Simple, yet wise words . . .
image: the frisky

Image: loveyourchaos
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Fear less, hope more;
Eat less, chew more;
Whine less, breathe more;
Talk less, say more;
Hate less, love more;
And all good things are yours.
Swedish Proverb
A few posts back, I wrote about feeling depleted. I needed to find center, and did just that last week, sort of. I “took stock”. I figured a few things out. Two aspects of my life that are absolutely critical to happiness? Yoga and writing. It’s become increasingly clear that I need to create and keep a balance of both. For the last few years, the majority of my work has been teaching yoga. My writing life existed only in freelancing and blogging. Not enough. However, in 2008 I left my old life to escape corporate America, focus on family and to teach yoga. I should be happy, right?
In my old life I wrote a lot professionally. This part was quite fulfilling. However, family life was secondary to professional life because of a lack of time and constantly being stressed and tired. I barely practiced yoga then. I needed it more than ever. I realized this life, this job was not serving me personally, professionally or spiritually. I left. No, not just like that. It was difficult. I struggled with the decision even after making it . . . was it the right decision? would I make the same kind of money again? who am I now, really? In the end, it absolutely was the right decision for me. But it’s taken two years to find balance.
Teaching yoga has and continues to be fulfilling, but only if its balanced with other aspects of life. If all of my eggs are in the yoga basket, off-balance I go again. My yoga practice means so much to me and I teach from that place. It’s personal and I care about it and I want others to experience it deeply. While its not about me, it is still from me. I give of myself through my teaching.
I began a new job about a month ago and its given me more of an intellectual challenge than I’ve had since I left my old life two years ago. The job incorporates customer service, web design and *writing* . . . YAY! And the best aspect? I can work from home. I can take M to school and pick her up. I can have dinner with my family in the evenings. I can do laundry on my breaks throughout the day. I don’t have to drive or spend money on gas. My new employer is straight-forward about his expectations. Lines of communication are wide open. He is extremely family-oriented and hopes that his employees share this enthusiasm. Do the job well, get the work done and get-on with enjoying your life! Amazing. Energizing. I am exhilarated that life placed me on this path. Two years later and I’m doing both of the things I love . . . writing and teaching.
This post was partially inspired by Nikki, who left a comment on my blog yesterday. She found her way here from a post by Emma at The Joy of Yoga, who wrote about single kid-less yoga teachers. It got me thinking about my own life, how I define it and what is important. My daughter, M, is not wee little; she’s pre-teen and she needs me as much now as she did during diaper and toddler years. . . maybe more so. She’s into her friends, sports, even boys. But she talks to me. I want to keep it that way. Spending time with her, nourishing our relationship is critical and its exactly what I intend to do as she continues to grow. Being a mom is the number one reason I exist right now. I can’t imagine it any differently. Being a mom automatically places you in a teaching role, but just like being a yoga teacher, I learn by keeping my heart open. In life we are ALL teachers and we are ALL students. When we begin to define and set strict rules around how we are supposed to be, how our lives are supposed to be, we get stuck. Being a yoga teacher and a mom only gives me different experiences in which to work from.
The key to all of it? Balance. For me it includes work, practicing yoga, teaching, writing, creating, spending quality time with friends and family. It is all important. I worked almost 50 hours last week, but I was home most of the time. I only taught one class as I was on break from OhioU. This week I’ll start back at OhioU and work a bit less at the other job. Balance.
This weekend was wonderful! I felt justified in only doing what I (we/family) wanted to do! M and I created jewelry, Random Acts of Kindness Cards and Up-cycled Magazine Envelopes for my Etsy shop. J, M and I went to the high school football game. We hung out with friends. We drove to Athens to absorb the eclectic college town vibe. We cooked out. We made homemade pizza. We watched movies. We slept in. We ate ice cream. We talked. We laughed (a lot). We loved.
Enjoy this beautiful day! As for me, I’m going for a walk before working a few hours this afternoon . . .
Peace Love and Light,
I have been wanting to write this post for days but haven’t had the time . . . a Project thriftEEE update. I began my journey with Project thriftEEE on July 23rd and committed to 3 months at that time, July 23 to October 23.
Here are my insights thus far . . .
Here are the details . . .
Bullets 1 & 2 go together. I am need of new dishtowels and a bathroom rug. Typically, I could go to the dollar store and pick all of these up (whim), but most would fall apart within a year. Dishtowels I bought less than a year ago are rags now. Recently, I bought two vintage dishtowels at an antique mall. All of my *new* dishtowels will now be vintage, but I can’t buy them on a whim. I found several on Etsy that I like and will be purchasing over the next month. Plus they are so much more interesting than dollar store towels!
I had two birthday parties to go to last weekend. They were for my friends’ daughters. M and I made jewelry for each of the girls and I made cute little *upcycled* envelopes to put them in. I will begin to sell these envelopes on my Etsy site, probably in sets of 10, once I get enough made. The envelopes will be unsealed, along with stickers to seal them with. I gave one present to a friend of mine in a Yoga Journal upcycled envelope. She commented on how cute and unique it was.
For the girls, we used old copies of Dog Fancy that my parents gave to me. I have some old books and atlases that I may do the same thing with.
I have not been antique or thrift store shopping at all. I haven’t purchased anything besides food and gas over the last month or so for myself. M got money from her aunt to go school shopping. I would have preferred we went to the consignment shop so she could get more bang for her buck, but she wanted Target. It was her money and that is where we went. The only other items I currently need are jewelry supplies. I’ve been lurking on Etsy and will be buying supplies in the next month. I may buy a few basic items, however, from Hobby Lobby so I can buy in bulk.
I feel good about the project so far. It was never meant to be about guilt anyway, only mindfulness. All-in-all, it’s been easy and natural. I’ve just noticed my tendency to shop on a whim for things that aren’t really necessary anyway, and I’m living without. M’s birthday is in September, so I have some thinking to do about that! How are things going for you? Have you joined Project thriftEEE, an exercise in Mindful Consumerism yet?
Peace Love and Light . . .
Being a yoga teacher has it’s highs and lows, just like life. What matters is what we do with those feelings. Yoga teaches us about non-attachment and it is important not to get attached to the good, or the bad. Everything comes and goes, waxes and wanes, ebbs and flows. This is life.
I love teaching yoga. It is absolutely amazing to watch people grow in their practice and to see them feel good, really good . . . at peace, sometimes for the first time in a long time. This is one of the most satisfying aspects of the job for me. Every time I teach I put my whole heart into it. Yoga isn’t just a physical exercise. It’s a philosophy, a lifestyle. But . . . and this is a BIG but . . . it’s different for everyone. We all internalize it in our own ways and these ways change and shift over time depending on our lives.
For the most part, my teaching is fulfilling. Students stay after class to talk, connect and ask questions. This is wonderful! But, every once in a while a student throws you for a loop. Since I teach at a college, I guess this is to be expected. One credit hour can mean the difference between financial aid and zip. My classes have been full since I started teaching there, and word of mouth brings more people each quarter. This quarter, however, has been particularly painful and trying. I’ve had two students (a couple? I don’t know) in class who laugh, smirk, check out and look at each other throughout. I breathe to get through it and tell myself don’t worry about it . . . all of the others are loving class. However, it can take a lot out of a person. I realize my ego is in all of this. I realize yoga is so much bigger than me, but seriously. How can people be that UN-self-aware? Or do they not care or realize it’s hurtful? I go on, seemingly unaffected because its not fair to the other students to give it too much of my energy. Hold the space. Be the peace.
What I’ve been feeling lately is a bit depleted. I teach, but don’t nourish myself enough by taking classes. It’s just difficult due to the length of travel to get there. On top of this, I feel isolated at times, as a teacher, rural, with like-minded people only close via the web. For this I am truly grateful, but I need more. Here.
So, on goes it. I took a second job doing something else I love . . . writing! Plus I am connecting with people directly, working for a fabulous company that is forward thinking in their approach to business. I can work whenever and wherever I have access to a computer, phone and internet. I am connecting, not through yoga, but professionally and personally. I am using my intellect and the skills I gained in my “former life” but without all of the bureaucracy that went along with it. I’d say I’m not sure how it happened, but that wouldn’t be true. When we open ourselves to life, we get exactly what we need. I feel blessed to be walking in my shoes today.
What is interesting is that whenever I think I’ve made up my mind about something, another layer gets tossed on top of it. I had a girl stop me after class tonight, telling me she really enjoys my class and that she hopes I’ll continue to teach there. We connected through our hearts and though yoga. Then a second person emailed me when I got home, asking where I am teaching now and asked if he could “drop in” anywhere. . .
Ultimately, I’ve decided to cut back to two classes per week at the local college and will likely continue at the other location with potential breaks in between sessions. I need to find time to take some classes instead of teaching them. As a teacher, I am a student too; maybe more so.
I’ve realized in the process that yoga connects us in so many ways. Unimaginable ways sometimes. I am a part of my student’s lives. They tell me stories, cry on my shoulder, share triumphs and deplete me. This is life and I AM LIVING IT. Fully! Life is a journey. I’m not sure the path I am taking right now, but you know what? It’s okay. It will all work out as it is supposed to, and probably better than expected!
Peace Love & Light on your path!
p.s. to my blog friends . . . stay with me. My visits are more sporadic these days, but connections are deeper than comments.
You, just as you are, and your life here, right now, are all there is and all you need to know. You don’t have to do anything special. Mostly, you have to be open to meeting face to face, and even dancing with, the truth that pertains to your life right now. You have to find a way to collect your fractured pieces, examine them, and then accept them as part of who you are. Spiritual practice is about transformation, but it’s also, and more importantly, about working with what is.
~ Angel Kyodo Williams