Namaste_Heather

I don’t know whats gotten into me.  I’ve been feeling a need to let the world know who I am.  I was just talking to some friends about that the other day.  I know who I am, very much so.  But I do wonder sometimes how others perceive me.  I am introverted and introspective, so it is something I ponder from time to time.   In the end, though, I’m just me, and that is okay no matter what.  Now I’m going to tell you a story.  It’s a deep story that tells a lot about me, I think.

Mondays are always more introspective than other days.  In the shower, I usually go through the previous week, assessing the positives and negatives of my life. This morning, for whatever reason, I reflected upon some life changing events that happened to me 10 years ago. 

4 Major Life Changing Events that happened within a 2 month span of time.

Since I declared that Mondays are for M, let me tell you this story now, because in the end it is ALL about M.

Life Event #1:

M’s dad and I were never married.  Our relationship was a volatile, unhealthy one for pretty much the 7 years we were together.  During November of 1999, we broke up for what I thought was the final time.  Because this break-up was huge for me, I decided to do something drastic.  A friend of mine was home from California for the Holidays.  We began talking, and with a very gentle twist of the arm, I decided to move back to CA with her (from Ohio).  I quit my job.  I moved out of my apartment.  I prepared myself for a move across the country.   No big deal, right?   Well, it wouldn’t have been, but then #2 happened.

Life Event #2

It’s now the first week of December 1999.  My mother learns that she has breast cancer.  How can I move out of the state with this news?  Mom has a mastectomy just before Christmas and learns that she must undergo chemotherapy twice per month.  This, as you can imagine, is devastating news.  She and I become much closer, as I attend all chemo treatments with her over the next 6 months.  I would not have been able to do this, had I stayed at the job I just quit.  (Mom is cancer free today!)  M’s dad and I reconcile.  Why?  You’ll find out in a few paragraphs.

Life Event #3

My best friend, Mollee is killed in a car accident on January 2, 2000.  My life will never be the same again.  Since her departure from this Earth, I’ve never had another “best girlfriend”.  She was an amazing woman I will never forget!

Life Event #4

I learn that I am unexpectedly pregnant with M during the fourth week of January 2000.  What?  Yes.  Pregnant.  Mixed emotions at the time.  A total blessing in the end!  M is my beautiful daughter!  I can’t imagine life without her today.

I connect all of these events together.  I don’t know how anyone could see them as random and not connected.  I have always believed that things happen for a reason and after going through such craziness in such a short time period, it just solidifies it for me even more.  I studied birth psychology during my pregnancy, trying to figure out the connection.  I don’t know exactly what it is, but certainly something deeper is going on here.

Some more funny synchronicities to the story . . . Mollee was a redhead.  M is a redhead; (I was a toe head as a child and M’s dad is half Panamanian – dark skin/eyes).  Isn’t red hair a recessant gene?  One of M’s current teachers at school is Mollee’s aunt, and we live in a totally different county.  This teacher, Mollee’s aunt, is the mother of one of J’s (my husband’s) friends.  In my mind this is more than 6 Degrees of Separation.

I guess part of my point to this story is the connectedness of EVERYTHING.  So often we don’t pay attention to the details, and I’ve found over the years that if we do, we can always find deeper meanings to things than we believed to be there previously.

That was my life ten years ago.  I am in a completely different space now and couldn’t have imagined a better outcome.  Luckily I didn’t have to.  The Universe had these plans for me, probably before I was even conceived?